Principal Skinner: Uh oh. Two independent thought alarms in one day. The students are overstimulated. Willie! Remove all the colored chalk from the classrooms.
Groundskeeper Willie: I warned ya! Didn't I warn ya? That colored chalk was forged by Lucifer himself.

Ah, there's nothing more exciting than science. You get all the fun of sitting still, being quiet, writing down numbers, paying attention... Science has it all.

I'm going to enjoy devouring you, Bart Simpson. Yes... I believe I'll start, as you've so often suggested, by... eating your shorts.

Skinner: Well...maybe it was for the best. Now I... I finally have time to do what I've always wanted: write the great American novel. Mine is about a futuristic amusement park where dinosaurs are brought to life through advanced cloning techniques. I call it "Billy and the Clonasaurus."
Apu: Oh, you have got to be kidding, sir. First you think of an idea that has already been done, then you give it a title that nobody could possibly like. Didn't you think this through...
...was on the bestseller list for eighteen months! Every magazine cover had...
...most popular movies of all time, sir! What were you thinking?! I mean, thank you, come again.

Well, Edna, for a school with no Asian kids, I think we've put on a darn good science fair.

Attention! This is Principal Skinner, your principal, with a message from the Principal's Office. All students please proceed immediately to an assembly in the Butthead Memorial Auditorium.